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Old 11-24-2008, 11:58 AM   #91
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How can he work so hard to disprove God, without already acknowledging Him?
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Old 12-06-2008, 01:55 AM   #92
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Source unknown, claimed to be 4Chan or something
It all begins with the Old Testament, god creates the universe, he sees it and it's serious business, but then Satan pretends to be a snake and trolls Eve, telling her : ''Apple or GTFO'' ( because she was already showing tits ). She chooses the former and then her and her fuck buddy Adam get banned from Eden for being trollbait. Then a lot of serious incest occurs and we get the human race ( which explains a lot, really ).

Then later, God gets uber pissed about Pharaoh Hitler pwning the Jews, so he gives Moses some cheat codes for the universe. Moses stages a massive slave runaway and opens up the sea so the Jews can run through, closing it behind him and drowing the ancient Nazis. God lol'd.

Some other less important shit happens, mostly composed of a bunch of faggots writing emo poetry about God, for him to fap to.


New Testament, God sees Mary sleeping and just sticks the tip in and drops his load. Nine months later, Jesus is born. For his 13rd birthday, God gave Jesus more cheat codes than he gave Moses, plus the rcon password for life, and some CP.

Later, Jesus became a hard core ska punk and trolled the Old School Jews hard. They became super pissed and permbanned him with a cross and Nine Inch Nails. They forgot he had god mode turned on though, so he waited 3 days and hit vid_restart on the rcon panel, came back into life's server, and laughed at the Jews.

After that, 3 more guys tell the same story, then this faggot Paul wrote an assload of shit about sex being evil and a bunch of other stuff that Jesus never fucking said, but everybody listened to Paul anyway because they're stupid.

TEH END
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Old 12-06-2008, 05:04 AM   #93
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Yeah, I don't have the picture, but I saw a screenshot of that posted on 4chan. Very entertaining :P
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Quote:
Originally posted by Kyrbi0
Huh. Almost makes me wish I had a girlfriend, to take advantage of today (wait, no, that's not what I meant... I mean, take advantage of the fact that it is international women's day... gah, never mind).
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Rome may not have been built in a day, but the Romans sure as hell didn't say "look at this great city we built guys!" when they had nothing more than a bit of stone and some cottages.
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Old 09-11-2009, 09:46 PM   #94
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This hasn't gotten entries in awhile, but I wanted to share this... And yes, it was not made by me.

So why did the chicken cross the road?

Aristotle: "It is the nature of chickens to cross roads."

Saddam Hussein: "This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it."

Captain James T. Kirk: "To boldly go where no chicken has gone before."

Martin Luther King, Jr: "I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives being called into question."

Moses: "And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken, 'Thou shalt cross the road.' And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing."

Jerry Seinfeld: "Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, 'What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway?'"

George W. Bush: "We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here."

Albert Einstein: "Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference."

Ernest Hemingway: "To die. In the rain."

Dr. Seuss: "Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told!"

Buddha: "Asking this question denies your own chicken nature."

Kindergarten Teacher: "To get to the other side."

---

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"It is an important and popular fact that things are not always what they seem. For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much - the wheel, New York, wars and so on - whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man - for precisely the same reasons."
~Douglas Adams, The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy
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"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love,
I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge,
and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing."

— 1 Corinthians 13:1-2

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Last edited by Ignitedstar : 09-11-2009 at 09:51 PM.
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Old 10-29-2009, 08:28 AM   #95
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The most best thing!
Hidden information:
here it comes!
Hidden information:
Almost there
Hidden information:
"Key boad Failed! Press a Key to continue!"-MOS DOS or something whatever
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Old 01-11-2010, 07:38 AM   #96
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"I think sometimes, Why, this people mean well; they are only ignorant; they would do better if they knew how: why give your neighbors this pain to treat you as they are not inclined to? But I think, again, This is no reason why I should do as they do, or permit others to suffer much greater pain of a different kind."
- Henry David Thoreau, Civil Disobedience
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"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love,
I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge,
and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing."

— 1 Corinthians 13:1-2

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Old 01-19-2010, 09:54 PM   #97
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lol @ people quoting themselves. I hate it when people do that. You don't get to decide if the things you say yourself are wise.

Here is my list of wise words and wise cracks (some may have been posted before):

"I'll sleep when I'm dead."
-Warren Zevon

"What can be asserted without proof can be dismissed without proof."
-Christopher Hitchens

"In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite."
-Paul Dirac

"History will be kind to me for I intend to write it."
-Winston Churchill

"I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it."
-Mark Twain

"All's fair in love and war."
-John Lyly

"If ever there was a holy war, it was that which saved our liberties and gave us independence."
-Thomas Jefferson

"Not without hope we suffer and we mourn."
-William Wordsworth

"One good test is worth a thousand expert opinions."
-Wernher von Braun

"It is not the function of our Government to keep the citizen from falling into error; it is the function of the citizen to keep the Government from falling into error."
- U.S. Supreme Court, in American Communications Association v. Douds, 339 U.S. 382,442

"I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong."
-Bertrand Russell

"I speak Spanish to God, Italian to women, French to men, and German to my horse."
-King Charles V

"One death is a tragedy. A million deaths is a statistic."
-Joseph Stalin

"I am the King of Rome, and above grammar."
-Emperor Sigismund

"History is philosophy teaching by example."
-Dionysius of Halicarnassus

"Faith is believing something you know ain't true."
-Mark Twain

"Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth."
-Ludwig Börne

"He that would live in peace and at ease must not speak all he knows or all he sees. "
-Benjamin Franklin

"Search others for their virtues, thyself for thy vices."
-Benjamin Franklin

“In this world nothing is certain but death and taxes.”
-Benjamin Franklin

"Eat to please thyself, but dress to please others."
-Benjamin Franklin

"He who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare, And he who has one enemy will meet him everywhere."
-Ali ibn-Abi-Talib

"Can you imagine what I would do if I could do all I can? "
-Sun Tzu (The Art of War)

"The covers of this book are too far apart."
-Ambrose Bierce

"Only the dead have seen the end of the war."
-Plato

“Trying is the first step to failure.”
-Homer Simpson

"Thanks, but no thanks on that Bridge to Nowhere."
-Sarah Palin

Last edited by Fluff : 01-19-2010 at 09:54 PM.
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Old 04-24-2010, 03:26 AM   #98
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I got another one:
"There are none so blind than those who will not see"
-Unknown
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Old 04-28-2010, 11:28 PM   #99
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"I reject any form of government in which the opinion of the village idiot is given the same weight as the opinion of Aristotle" (Unknown)
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Old 06-25-2010, 08:21 PM   #100
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They say that the dying words of a person are their most powerful... What will you say on your death bed before your eyes close forever? I got these from here.

Friends applaud, the comedy is finished.
- Ludwig van Beethoven, composer, d. March 26, 1827

Beautiful.
In reply to her husband who had asked how she felt.
~~ Elizabeth Barrett Browning, writer, d. June 28, 1861

Oh, so this is where it came from...

Et tu, Brute?
Assassinated.
~~ Gaius Julius Caesar, Roman Emperor, d. 44 BC

The earth is suffocating . . . Swear to make them cut me open, so that I won't be buried alive.
Dying of tuberculosis.
~~ Frederic Chopin, composer, d. October 16, 1849

My God. What's happened?
~~ Diana (Spencer), Princess of Wales, d. August 31, 1997

Do you hear the rain? Do you hear the rain?
Minutes before her plane crashed.
~~ Jessica Dubroff, seven-year-old pilot, d. 1996

Please know that I am quite aware of the hazards. Women must try to do things as men have tried. When they fail, their failure must be but a challenge to others.
Last letter to her husband before her last flight.
KHAQQ calling Itasca. We must be on you, but cannot see you. Gas is running low.
Last radio communiqué before her disappearance.
~~ Amelia Earhart, d. 1937

I've had a hell of a lot of fun and I've enjoyed every minute of it.
~~ Errol Flynn, actor, d. October 14, 1959

God will pardon me, that's his line of work.
~~ Heinrich Heine, poet, d. February 15, 1856

Oh, do not cry - be good children and we will all meet in heaven.
~~ Andrew Jackson, US President, d. 1845

And, for the anti-thesis:

Go on, get out - last words are for fools who haven't said enough.
To his housekeeper, who urged him to tell her his last words so she could write them down for posterity.
~~ Karl Marx, revolutionary, d. 1883
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"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love,
I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge,
and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing."

— 1 Corinthians 13:1-2

Current Works:
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Last edited by Ignitedstar : 06-25-2010 at 08:22 PM.
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Old 03-17-2011, 06:49 PM   #101
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Someone said, "Ignorance is bliss."

But I believe that the person who replied to that someone held a greater wisdom to teach. "Some people like to live blindfolded, because it means living happy."
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"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love,
I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge,
and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing."

— 1 Corinthians 13:1-2

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Old 03-17-2011, 07:32 PM   #102
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ignitedstar
Someone said, "Ignorance is bliss."
But once the gates are opened...

"If I hadn't seen such riches, I could live with being poor."
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Old 01-14-2014, 03:05 AM   #103
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A recent user on Kotaku said this:

"The first type of a passionate person is the wonderful one. They are passionate about something and they think that this thing is wonderful. They spend their time on it because it gives them joy. These are the people that contribute (whether they make some sort of a career out of it, or only rudimentary amateur attempts that never go further), or else who consume it incredibly (or both!). They talk to other people about their passion and try to show them why it's so wonderful.

The second type of passionate person is the jerk. They are passionate about something and they think that this makes them unique, and so they jealously guard it. If you don't know about their passion, they regard you as a pariah, some ignorant fool that isn't worth their time or compassion; if you DO know about their passion, but not in the exact same way as them, they shun you as an imposter, or a poser, someone who wishes to steal from them their unique status. These are the people that quibble over minor details as if they are life altering, who correct every teeny misstatement with a pronouncement that begins with "Well, actually..." and who actively drive away others from their passion."
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"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love,
I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge,
and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing."

— 1 Corinthians 13:1-2

Current Works:
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Old 01-14-2014, 09:04 AM   #104
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Skinning Contest #14 WinnerSkinning Contest #15 WinnerHero Contest #2 - 1st Place

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I know that it's dumb and shallow but one of my favorite quotes comes from the flavor text of a WoW item:
"All souls reveal their nature when trusted, even when trusting is undeserved."
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Old 01-14-2014, 06:41 PM   #105
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ignitedstar
They say that the dying words of a person are their most powerful... What will you say on your death bed before your eyes close forever? I got these from here.
These are pretty good, and remind me (favorably) of the wonderful "Way of Kings" chapter headings. (If you've read it, don't ruin it; one of my favorite parts of the book when they get more into that :P).


Quote:
Originally Posted by John Greenleaf Whittier
“Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these, 'It might have been.”
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=It was brought to my attention recently that the ":P" icon stands for "tongue-sticking out", and not the "smirky half-smile" I was using it for all these years. = Thusly I apologize for any unintentional juvenilization of my messages to anyone so afflicted.=
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