View Single Post
Old 09-29-2009, 08:37 AM   #1
Ignitedstar's Avatar

RP Section Moderator
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,755

Ignitedstar has a spectacular aura about (102)Ignitedstar has a spectacular aura about (102)Ignitedstar has a spectacular aura about (102)Ignitedstar has a spectacular aura about (102)

Send a message via MSN to Ignitedstar Send a message via Yahoo to Ignitedstar
Default The Experiment - Perfection : 'Perfection' : "Perfection"

[Note to Readers]
Please, I ask that no one writes a post in this thread other than myself. Those who want to comment on any section of this thread should send me a PM. Take a mental note that since I should be the only one posting in this thread, there is no need for me to write down that no one should post (except me). I will continue on and off as I go along, editing my posts and making a new post altogether when deemed appropriate.

One more thing. If you decide to read this, I would very much appreciate constructive criticism! Not only that, but please... Questions, questions, questions!


I am writing all of this, because as a writer, I feel that I must take a ridiculously huge step in a story that I have had in my head for the past four years. Throughout this time, the story has gone through many phases. At first, it was a way of passing extreme story ideas into something usable. Eventually, I couldn't help but wonder what I could use it all for. That changed in the few last years, when I seriously began to lie in bed for hours on end at night and ponder, "What would happen to him if he met other people? What would he do, and what kind of person would he become if subject to other people of different identities?" I wanted to forge a character in a perfect, isolated world where he is surrounded by others like himself, but has never gotten a real chance to interact with people. In other words, us. This brings me back to what I said in the beginning of this paragraph: I must take a ridiculous huge step forward, and turn this imaginative story that has been molding in my mind into written communication- but I don't want something 'just written'. In my mind, I constantly feel this thought: "If I can't interpret what he thinks, acts, and how judges his actions and other peoples', there's no point in writing anything down."

Many may want to know: "Who is he?" A few may know him from Horribly Unjustified, but this is an early draft of when I was still questioning myself about what kind of person he is. That short story is more of an extension of his attitude towards control. As in matter of fact, I'm not sure what kind of person he is, exactly. Constantly, I run scenarios in my mind, where sometimes he is nice, naughty, mean, curious, cruel, polite, vain, sophisticated, primitive, devilish, vigilant, insane... and the list runs on. I believe that these personality traits he takes on are just made from the writer inside of me playing with his personality, but I have also found that it allows me to better define two parts of him: What he deems as not being himself, and what he identifies as himself. This becomes particularly important.

Ergh... What I'm trying to do here is not me trying to understand him... It's more, "What does he think of himself?" I want to get inside of his mind and see things through his eyes, his experiences, and his perspective. However, how can I see through the vision of someone that is only a work of fiction? Well, it looks I'll just have to try harder.


Background Knowledge
Needless to say, this story takes place on Earth, but where it takes place does not exist in the real world, hence this story is fiction from this point onwards. However, please be aware that this imaginary land is still part of the Earth, so in other parts of the world, we (Humans) exist. This place is a perfect world, in which nothing lives here except lush vegetation and the Experiments. Exploring that idea, it kind of reminds me of primordial Earth; before homo sapiens made the decision to explore and cultivate the world. It is better to say that the island has yet to be touched by civilization. Keep in mind that I said civilization, not human contact. On this enlarged, secluded island is a gigantic laboratory, built by a man long deceased. There is no limit to the size of the lab, as this information is not important. What is important, is what was made using the lab.

Even though the man who gave birth to the Experiments is long dead and gone, the Experiments themselves have taken advantage of the island's expansiveness. There is no sort of governing body on this island, other than the physical and intellectual power of the Experiments themselves. Some choose to live a life of solitude and peace, but there are others who commit insidious crimes for their own entertainment. Some are quite sophisticated and one may carry an intellectual conversation with them; others can only speak with grunts, roars, and body language. Some carry morals of great virtue. Others could care less.

The man needed a way to keep track of each Experiment. Therefore, he created his own nomenclature to identify his 'children'. Experiments would be grouped by letter, then given a number. For example, G-77. However, to keep his goals within a reasonable time frame, the scientist limited himself, stating that each letter group should only consist of about forty members. If the group was more successful to what the scientist was looking for, he would go beyond the number forty. He also added another restriction. For fear that all Experiments' personalities might be the same, he gave each letter group a personality trait commonly shared by each of its members. Although the man desired to go through letters A through Z, he was only able to get to the letter 'S'. Therefore, there are no Experiments within the letters beyond S (T, U, etc.). Very few times did the scientist take a different approach to the restrictions.

What is the goal of the Experiments? They all have their own personal goals, but the man who started it all had a specific question in mind: "What is perfection?" But even that is ambiguous for an end result (in others words, I won't tell you haha). He found it best to explore this question by making artificial life. What they do, how they think, and what actions they are likely to take must be done by one's own intuition. However, in order to simulate the experiment in a real world and keep the experiment controlled and contained as much as possible, he knew that each Experiment must be chaotic in personality, but must be bound to obey certain rules. But, didn't I just say earlier that there's no governing body?

This has to mean that there is no one to enforce these rules. Wrong. From birth onwards, the Experiments have something along the lines of a mechanical-like auto-response if something threatens the longevity of the experiment.


The main supporting character is a nameless someone who I call You. It may sound lazy and silly, but I've been debating about whether the Human character in this story should be a guy or a girl, and to be honest, I see it going both ways. However, I think the story would lose its power if two Humans were present at the same time. It's also due to the fact that I couldn't get far in developing a story where two Humans are present. Soon after drafting a few scenarios, I discovered that it distracts from the main character. Another reason is because You takes a very important role in the story. One of the primary reasons why I named this character You is because I want you (the reader) to have a personal experience with the main character. To further the experience, all actions of You will be expressed in second-person perspective.

Some may ask, "Why not just make the reader the main sub-character?" Unfortunately, the essence of having the reader as the actual supporting character doesn't work well, in my head. Wait- let me say that again. It isn't that it doesn't work well, I just don't think I could commit the time it would take to do this. In order to present you- the reader, as an effective character, I would have to create an adventure-type story where one can pick a set number of actions that will determine an ending. It isn't that I don't want to do this- as in matter of fact, if I do do it that way, it allows you to pick a future for the Experiments- which I think would be very entertaining. However, considering the amount of interactions that the current story has with- not just the secondary characters, but the main character especially, this story would take thousands of pages before it becomes what I want it to become: Something around a pseudo, real life experience. Perhaps some time in the future, I'll do this.

EDIT: 1/20/10

Some further thoughts on this subject: I have decided that the secondary character can be male, female, or androgynous. For this scenario of the Experiment, though, the Human character will be female.

I've made up my mind for the most part. If I keep thinking about what gender the Human is, I can never truly start become he/she/it is key to the main character's growth. Before I explain why the Human is female, I want to say why she isn't male. With the version in my head, the Human character is male, because it is considerably easier to have an intimate relationship between the main character and the Human that does not involve lovers (I could, but obviously not the point here). As we all know, there are multiple versions of intimate relationships; the one I want (or wanted) in particular was a master-servant relationship that does not involve a personal relationship for lovers.

At first, I had believed that having the Human as female would be more detrimental, but now that I think about it, having her as a female unlocks many potential conversations amongst others within the story. While I would definitely say that it is in a guy's right mind to be in touch with his wants, needs, and feelings- which was indeed the point, having two male characters in the main lead and main secondary character positions hurts a number of lesser themes and morals that can occur.

While I had intended to call the Human by the name You, that too, has changed. Now, I find it inappropriate to call her You, because she is now a character in flesh and the perspective of the story has changed from first-person to third. This decision is based mainly on one of the statements I had made above: there is simply too much to write and too many things that could happen that shouldn't have but easily could have happened that I didn't write down, so it makes me feel guilty (I am a very guilt-ridden person).

If you want to know her name, read the story. When you read it and see it, try to understand its significance. It's not that far from the beginning.

Current Times

All I'll say, is that 50 years have passed since the scientist died.
Current Activity: It's a secret, now.
Evaluation: I actually logged in?!?!
"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love,
I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge,
and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing."

1 Corinthians 13:1-2

Current Works:
Ignitedstar is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links - Login to hide this ad!